i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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