Duck Duck Cougar?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize