awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
My pussy is not your playground.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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