His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
