I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
