One girl and one boy is just not enough.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
