bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
