It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize