What a fucking waste of an outfit
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
