after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
