Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
