I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
