Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
