i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
