He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Everclear isn't food dammit
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
