Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize