I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
