how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
