READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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