My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
