Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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