Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I understand Curling. That high.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
