What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Randomize
