ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
