but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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