I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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