i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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