I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
