I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
