like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
