When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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