Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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