You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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