3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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