from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Randomize