David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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