One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
