I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
