I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize