I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize