is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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