My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
He did a backflip because drugs
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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