i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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