so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
