No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
