Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
