He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
