What did we do last night that was yellow?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
