i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
