Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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