2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
operation have a gay friend backfired
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
