Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
