I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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